When things feel like they are falling apart, I tend to look inwards and establish some semblance of control. For the last 4 years, it was impossible to not spend absurd amounts of time glued to the news. Lately it has become too much for me. It seems to be a good possibility that the POTUS has dementia, and only now that things are falling apart in Afghanistan has it become ok for the MSM to admit that it might be the case. The scene in Australia is out of some dystopian novel - and is similar in other countries. Lockdowns and madness abound. I just can't look anymore. It has been on my mind to begin writing here again. The hope is that it will allow me to capture the wonderful things that are absolutely happening, and are oftentimes overshadowed by the outside world. I'm trying to redirect my focus inward and not lose sight of all the wonderful everyday magic that surrounds us.
The kids have been back in school for a week now. No masks, and fully in person, so things feel somewhat normal in that regard. Back in 2020, I turned to Amazon and acquired a number of workbooks for each of the kids that covered all the different subjects. I used them to supplement what they were doing in school while e-learning, and continued to use them when the kids returned to school because everything was being done 100% on Chromebook, and I was concerned that my crew would forget how to hold a pencil. Then over this past summer, I stocked back up on workbooks to keep them busy in an attempt to avoid the "summer slide." We weren't always on top of it, but I think it helped. Eleanor attended the Summer Bridge program at our school because she needed a bit of extra help with reading and math. I've had one foot out the door, ready to jump to homeschooling in the event the school district mandated mask wearing or virtual learning. I feel like Eleanor and Jonathan have lost something in the strangeness of the last two school years, so I've started supplemental homeschooling. While they do attend public school full time, I try to reinforce what they are learning at school with additional exercises at home in the same workbooks that we've used during the pandemic. It feels like a good balance for now.
The garden is an unusual spot for August. Usually by now it is a wild mess, but thanks to the helping hands of Josh, the garden is weeded and has many empty spots. This year I finally admitted that I don't really enjoy growing vegetables, but I also was able to admit that I can't let go of it for now because I'm concerned about the grocery stores. We can grow potatoes easily enough - and spinach, too. We've stocked up on dry goods just in case things go really go sideways. I would love to be doing all these things because they were my passion - but honestly, my passion is keeping my family alive, not the garden itself. I've decided that for now it is good enough to keep the space ready to use if things really do get bad enough that we can't rely on buying fresh produce at Aldi's. The rest of the space is being used to grow beautiful perennial flowers and herbs. All that being said - I do hope that I can find some love of growing vegetables again. I think once it stops feeling like a matter of life and death and more like a hobby, the love will return.
There is more to say, but I'll save it for later. I'm setting a modest goal of posting in here once a week.
